What time does not tell

This past week hasn't been marked so much by time, as much as it has been bookmarked by meals and restaurants. I can't quite explain to you the blur that these past 5 days have been, other than the fact that I can recall specific events that happened, certain meals that were shared, a few conversations that took place.... the rest feels quite blurry and blended together. My grandma passed away late Tuesday night. She fought till her last moment, and finally God wrapped his hands on her and brought her peace and comfort. In the crazy process that this week has been, it got me thinking about what really is time. Sure, as someone who wears a watch daily and feels nakie without it, my first instinct is to say "Time is the clock, keeps a schedule, provides some sort of common agreement; most often marked by hours and minutes." Sometimes, time becomes the number of days, weeks, months or even years we've experienced. But at what point does time blend itself into the memories that stick with you for a lifetime?

Among the calls, texts, letters, emails and hugs of support that my family and I have gotten over the past 5ish days, reminiscing and sharing in tears of laughter and tears of sadness, and talking about memories have brought an equally significant type of comfort. I'm a firm believer, and forever will be, in the fact that nothing in the world can prepare you for the emotional loss of someone significant to you. This week has proven that to me in so many ways, I couldn't even count them. As the events of the week progressed, there were random bits and pieces that I learned about a woman who I loved so much, that were a mystery to me before. While my initial brain reaction was one of regret, I found a peaceful knowledge in the fact that this woman who is so much a part of my world, had so much more in common with me than I had ever known.

We spent a lot of time looking through pictures, letters, jewelry... all those things that wrapped Gurley into her perfect Gurley-ness. We found pictures, ugly sweaters (no offense), jewelry, purses, old letters and cards.... everything that was near and dear to her heart. I found her 50th reunion high school book-thingy. One of my favorite things about her was that whenever I told her my friend drama, no matter what it was, silly or stupid, there always seemed to be some parallel in her life. I so appreciate the way she shared her friend stories with me and made me feel like her experience was just what mine was too, which brought me comfort in knowing that everything would be alrite. There are several times I remember sitting at a table or couch, telling  Anyway, while I was looking at your 50th reunion book, your advice to your fellow classmates was "Live, Laugh, Love." How did we not know that we shared the same life motto? I can't make this up... I have this saying on multiple things! I truly am her grand-daughter!!!!

There are many things that will only be ours. After school talk shows, swimming during the summers (remember how I would put my goggles on, go under water, check out your water aerobic exercises, come up to the surface and "copy" you?), getting our nails done,  treating my friends in the same way that you treated me (Kris loves you for it, how could she not?! Heather does too!), going miniture golfing in Castro Valley, watching Annie, and other movies for that matter (We saw Goodburger, and I also saw Love Actually with my grandma for the first time....), talking about Dancing with the Stars, school and teacher advice, helping you out at the library and getting to do the scan-books-magnitize thingy... all of these things were marked by time at some point or another, but now they are just memories we have. Memories that I will keep for forever. Gurley, I miss you tons, will love you always, and will always be your Cookie.